The life that awaits me

"Exams....

Just to clear up the rumours, we aim to release the exam results by 3pm May 
20 via Blackboard"

Got this email from Kat. Was it really a relief? Or is it just another seemed-long wait to know the truth. The truth about my efforts during the last two terms, the truth about my level of competence in MCBoM and HBoM. Year one's almost drawing its finale, and I'm still in the midst of no where. Cardiovascular lessons are already half way through, and all I did was anticipating the sphygmomanometer that I bought a couple of days ago to arrive, to practise my clinical skills, when I am not required to do so. And to remind me that I'm still lost, I just found out what's the difference between Stroke volume and Cardiac output a couple of days ago, when I should have known it weeks ago.

I need prayers!!!! and Lucks now!!!!

Spent my weekend, no, burnt my weekend watching Ampang Medikal. I would say it's the Malaysian version of Greys but the point is, it portrays what would most likely to happen during our HO or as students in UK name it, F1. Well, I'm not sure how far the truth goes in the series but as far as I'm concerned, the show is portraying things my siblings shared with me through out the years. 36 hours non-stop working, then you get a 5pm to 7am break, then another 36 hours. You probably have to sustain that in a few weeks interval and it will last for 2 long HO years. Gosh, what a life awaits me. I really hope to stay forever as a student now.

And as an extra ingredient, a HO will have to sustain the pressure from the ones up above him or her. I could just imagine myself standing beside the bed don't know what to do when a patient suddenly drop dead right before my own eyes. And just when I was about to doubt more, the nurse's plot came along. Yes, nurses are perhaps our saviors in the hospitals. At most times, they have been in that field for ages, but because of the word nurse, they are no where near this 5 years course's reward. Seriously, don't they deserve to be called Medical Officers as well? Well, I'm not saying ordinary nurses but for those who have serve the field for ages, of one that would think like a doctor does, one that posses equivalent level of knowledge. Back to the point, the nurses are likely to tell us what to do especially when we have just started our HO tenure.

Conclusion? Learn your lessons well and make sure you have your skills at fingertips! Ok, I'm telling myself.

p/s: the post earlier entitled "Random" was a subplot of the show that make me ponder more about relationship in the hospital.